Boring Me Softly

Tuesday, April 6, 2010
A special 16th birthday in the city

For the past few years, Younger Daughter and I have celebrated her birthday with a shopping trip to South Street, dinner and a show. This year was a big one because it was her 16th birthday.

In inordinate number of his "columns" lately have been about his daughter. Just last week it was her being assistant stage manager for "Beauty and the Beast"; now it's something about her birthday. I wonder what it could be - a reflection on his own lost youth? A sentimental tale of a father's love for his daughter?

South Street, of course, is prime real estate for people watching, one of my favorite activities while on shopping trips because, well, there really isn’t anything else for me to do but sit around and watch people while Younger Daughter shops. And you can see just about everything on South Street, particular when it comes to clothes and tattoos. It’s a highlight real of humanity.

"Highlight real" is, of course, [sic]. Again, this man is the executive editor of a newspaper group. At this point, my only hope for the story is that a flash mob breaks out.

This year for dinner we ended up at one of those Japanese steakhouses where the chef cooks the food on grill right at your table. I hadn’t been to one of those places in about 30 years and had forgotten how entertaining and talented the chefs can be.

Perhaps this column isn't beyond saving - time for some classic Morsch ethnocentrism? Will he mock the name of the foreign chef?

At one point, the chef flipped a bite-sized bit of zucchini with his spatula up into the air and directly into my mouth. Of course, it took him three tries to get something into my big piehole, the first attempt going wide left and hitting me in the cheek with the second try coming in high and tight and clipping the end of my beezer.

"Beezer"? If this was any other context, I'd assume it's MM's pet name for his genitalia. Also, the phrases "wide left" and "high and tight" smack of unnecessary baseball references... but I'll let it pass.

I still can’t figure out how he missed a mouth as big as mine. Twice.

Classic MM self-deprecation. Isn't he belaboring the point, though?

We capped off the evening by seeing the play “Fallen Angels” at the Walnut Street Theater. Younger Daughter is very much into theater arts and we enjoyed the show quite a bit. The Walnut Street Theater is a real landmark and a real treasure.
It was a wonderful day for father and daughter to spend some time together.

And that's it? That's all he could muster? This isn't even sentimental, it's just... the story of what happened one day. This is the "Seinfeld" of Outta Leftfield posts. It's a post about nothing.

Labels: Mike Morsch, Montgomery Newspapers, Outta Leftfield, South Street, Walnut Street Theater

Any chance either South Street or the Walnut Street Theater will crop up here again?