Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Ballparks and recreation
For a humor columnist, this man's supply of topics seems shockingly small, doesn't it?
Big baseball weekend at our house, which isn’t too much out of the ordinary, really.
No kidding.
Leading off was a college tilt as St. Joseph’s took on Temple in a twinbill Saturday afternoon at Skip Wilson Field on the Temple Ambler campus. It was the first time I had gotten to enjoy a game at that particular field and it’s a pretty nice college ballyard.
"Ballyard"? Really? He couldn't have just said "...at that particular field, and it's a pretty nice one"?
This matchup was of particular interest because Father of Blonde Accountant and The Blonde Accountant are both St. Joe’s grads and Pop Pop pitched for the Hawks back in his day. I have no allegiance to either team, but I do enjoy watching college baseball when I get the chance. The accompanying video shows some of those sites and sounds.
Is "Pop Pop" the same person as Father of Blonde Accountant? I like his criteria for an interesting game - out of three, two people went to one of the schools, and the third person doesn't care.
St. Joe’s took both games from the Owls, although we could only stay for the first game. Son of Blonde Accountant had his regular season CYO finale back in Montgomeryville so we headed back for that. Tough day for the youngster as he took the collar and his team lost. But the rain held off until after all baseball was done for the day, so that was good.
What exactly is the theme of this paragraph? Hawks vs. Olws? Game in Montgomeryville? The weather?
On Sunday, Son of Blonde Accountant and I took in the Reading Phillies. We got to see some of the young Phillies prospects — like pitchers J.C. Ramirez and Phillippe Aumont, first baseman Matt Rizzotti and shortstop Freddy Galvis — and the rain held off long enough for the home team to secure a victory.
I must be missing all the jokes so far, by the way. Should we re-name this the "Here's What I Did Today Weblog"?
One of the many wonderful things about baseball is the terminology, of which we heard plenty over the weekend, mostly during the college game.
For example, the following phrases can usually only be heard on the ballfield:
Ah yes, the "ballfield."
— “Lotta hop!” — It means, “Stay aggressive, show a lot of enthusiasm.”
— “Right man, right now” — Refers to having the best hitter at the plate with runners in scoring position able to get a clutch hit and drive in the runs.
That was a tortured sentence.
— “Hum, baby!” — Usually what is said to a pitcher, as in “Hum that pitch in there” or “throw it hard.”
Then of course, there is the umpire bating. Umpiring at the college level in particular is challenging and one must have a thick skin. There is a lot of chirping going on from the benches. Among my favorite lines over the years tossed at umpires:
Wow. So we get three uninteresting bits of baseball jargon, and now we're being "treated" to things Borsch has heard "over the years." Now we're not even talking about the weekend anymore!
— “Hey, poke a hole in that mask!”
— “Hey ump, shake your head, your eyes are stuck!”
Boy, two whole lines, huh? And these sound like the most generic insults one can imagine.
When I played, my dad didn’t get after the umpires too much — and neither did I — because we understood that umpires don’t win or lose ballgames. But when Pop did feel the need to sound off, he was relatively nice about it.
“Wake up ump, you’re missing a good game!”
Okay, no, THAT'S the most generic insult one can imagine. And what's with all these pointless digressions? Can we please settle on a theme for this post?
One of my alternative activities over the weekend was to go shopping with The Blonde Accountant for a new kitchen faucet.
You have got to be kidding me. This is terrible. What is this supposed to be about? And how is any of it funny?
Although that still has to happen, I believe this weekend qualified as an example of another common phrase: “Can’t beat fun at the old ballpark.”
But I thought the other phrases were UNcommon, because you'd only hear them at a baseball game. We'll have to take his word that any of this was fun, though, because he did such a terrible job of describing it.
Labels: Mike Morsch, Montgomery Newspapers, Outta Leftfield, Reading Phillies, St. Joseph's, Temple Ambler
On a side note, we've passed the 150-post mark at Inta Rightfield. The majority of these have been Borsch-related, and the most frightening thing is, he's getting worse. He's still writing about the same things, using the same jokes. His choice of topics is slowly dwindling down to four: concerts he sees, things he can't do, stories he reads on the Internet, and baseball.
More disturbing is his shameless abuse of sentiment; he's hawked his so-called "tribute" to his deceased uncles several times in search of awards. There is seemingly no depth to which he will not sink.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
He Can't Grill, Either
Outta Leftfield
When it comes to cleaning the grill, options can be half-baked
Published: Wednesday, May 11, 2011
By Mike Morsch
Unfortunately, you don't bake on a grill.
Mother’s Day proved to be Opening Day of the grilling season at our house, and I must admit, it appears that my barbecuing skills have not improved any during the off season. I can still burn meat with the best of them.
*Sigh* Self-deprecating humor is one thing, but is it even possible that one man can be bad at so many things? Will we be seeing columns about how he can't brush his teeth or tie his shoes?
But this season opens up with a bit of vindication: Turns out it’s not a completely and utterly ridiculous idea to suggest that a self-cleaning oven be utilized when cleaning the grates of the grill.
Years ago, I was laughed right out of my neighborhood for suggesting that if a self-cleaning oven could clean the oven’s grates, then why couldn’t it clean the grill’s grates with the same effectiveness?
Don't these two paragraphs say exactly the same thing?
There appear to be two schools of thought on this: the husband’s creative thinking methods designed to save elbow grease and maximize leisure time … and the right way as determined by the wife.
Wahoooo, here's an original idea for humor: the smart wife knows more than the dumb husband! Move over, Tim Allen!
Traditional cleaning of a charcoal grill goes something like this:
(1) Remove the grates and soak them in warm, soapy water.
(2) Make sure the beer is cold.
Ah, and a beer joke. We're opening up new horizons in comedy here, folks.
(3) Use a stiff wire brush to gently scrub the surface of the grates.
(4) Drink a cold beer.
It got funnier the second time, didn't it?
(5) Sit in the lawn chair and try to think of easier ways to clean the grill. (Throwing the grill away after every use and buying a new one certainly isn’t practical, but that doesn’t mean the idea should not be considered.)
(6) Approach wife with the self-cleaning oven idea, which makes a whole lot of sense before and after several beers.
How much longer is this list going to be?
(7) Pick the ridicule and chastisement out of your backside for even thinking you were bringing those nasty grill grates into a perfectly clean kitchen and sticking them into a brand new and perfectly clean oven.
The more clauses you add, the more amusing a sentence becomes.
(8) Drink another beer, scoff at the fact that Scrubbing Bubbles is not recommended for cleaning grills.
(9) Ponder the various uses of a wire brush that don’t involve grill grates. (I couldn’t think of any others.)
Third beer reference in a single list. #9 is actually a decent question.
(10) Take a nap in the lawn chair, allowing the grill sufficient time to air dry.
By suggesting years ago that the self-cleaning oven could do the work of the warm, soapy water, Scrubbing Bubbles and wire brush, I had apparently violated some kind of No Stinky Grill Grates in My New Oven Rule.
"Stinky"? Are grill grates really stinky? Dirty, yes, but are they really known for their odor?
However, there are any number of websites these days where information can be found supporting the theory of putting the grill grates in the self-cleaning oven. Maybe I was just ahead of my time in this area of thinking 10 years ago.
Try reading both those sentences out loud. They sound TERRIBLE. At this point, it may be interesting to refer back to his June 10, 2010 article on virtually the same subject. Some quotes of interest:
"...the first round of meat was successfully charred over the holiday weekend."
"Personally, if mankind can invent a self-cleaning oven, then I think it should be able to invent a self-cleaning grill. Failing that, we should at least be able to remove the grill’s grates and place them in a self-cleaning oven..."
So we have this year's article in 100 words or less, basically. Burn food? Check. Clean grill? Check. The end.
Things have evolved now for me in the area of grilling. I no longer have the Weber kettle charcoal grill. I have some kind of Cadillac gas grill. It’s a big, old thing that takes up a good chunk of a relatively small back deck, and provides me the opportunity to efficiently burn the meat at a higher level of grilling incompetence.
It's old? He just purchased it a year ago. Unless he's trying to use "big old" as in "large," in which case that comma doesn't belong there. Glad we FINALLY established that he burns meat, too.
And I do not utilize the self-cleaning oven at our house to clean the grill, mostly because I’m not even sure we have a self-cleaning oven. It was not among the important questions I asked in advance of a second marriage, which is a shortcoming on my part. That question should have been higher on the list.
What is he even talking about now?
Admittedly though, switching from a charcoal grill to a gas grill has not come without its perplexing issues. For example, this weekend while I was I was goosing the chicken with barbecuing implements,
"I was I was" - somebody didn't proofread!
my father-in-law and I were chit-chatting, and he ended up schooling me in how to check the level of propane that’s left in the tank, a method that I had not yet learned.
From "for" to "learned," that's all one sentence. How on earth does this man presume to edit the writing of others?
But he is a camping enthusiast from way back, so he has a certain amount of credibility in this area. He said the way to determine the level of propane left in the tank was to take some boiling water and pour it on the tank. The areas of the tank on which the water didn’t boil determined the level of propane in the tank.
And here I thought the areas of the tank on which the water didn't boil determined the level of propane in the garage. Good thing he specified.
He told me this assuming that I knew how to boil water. However, my science skills are very limited in the principles of propane gas, and for a moment, I thought he was pulling my leg.
So now he doesn't know how to boil water. My "can't brush teeth" column idea probably isn't too far off.
It has always been my policy to try and stay out of hot water, and I judge a successful outdoor grilling experience as one that doesn’t involve me blowing up the house.
How would you blow up the house if you're grilling outdoors?
Somehow, boiling water on a propane gas tank just wasn’t registering with me. (Disclaimer: Not that I don’t believe my father-in-law, but I did not in fact try pouring boiling water on the tank, so don’t do it unless you know it to be safe.)
Science teachers are welcome to come by the office and boot me in the backside and demand an explanation for me not paying attention back in junior high science class.
What? A science teacher is going to attack him because he won't pour boiling water on his propane tank? I don't remember outdoor grilling being a part of my high school education.
But that’s the type of grilling I really don’t need.
This column in 100 words or less: "I'm bad at grilling, but I think you should clean the grill grates in a self-cleaning oven. I'm not sure we even have a self-cleaning oven. My father-in-law told me how you can tell if you have propane in the tank, but I don't want to try. Hopefully my high school science teacher won't find out. Bad pun."
When it comes to cleaning the grill, options can be half-baked
Published: Wednesday, May 11, 2011
By Mike Morsch
Unfortunately, you don't bake on a grill.
Mother’s Day proved to be Opening Day of the grilling season at our house, and I must admit, it appears that my barbecuing skills have not improved any during the off season. I can still burn meat with the best of them.
*Sigh* Self-deprecating humor is one thing, but is it even possible that one man can be bad at so many things? Will we be seeing columns about how he can't brush his teeth or tie his shoes?
But this season opens up with a bit of vindication: Turns out it’s not a completely and utterly ridiculous idea to suggest that a self-cleaning oven be utilized when cleaning the grates of the grill.
Years ago, I was laughed right out of my neighborhood for suggesting that if a self-cleaning oven could clean the oven’s grates, then why couldn’t it clean the grill’s grates with the same effectiveness?
Don't these two paragraphs say exactly the same thing?
There appear to be two schools of thought on this: the husband’s creative thinking methods designed to save elbow grease and maximize leisure time … and the right way as determined by the wife.
Wahoooo, here's an original idea for humor: the smart wife knows more than the dumb husband! Move over, Tim Allen!
Traditional cleaning of a charcoal grill goes something like this:
(1) Remove the grates and soak them in warm, soapy water.
(2) Make sure the beer is cold.
Ah, and a beer joke. We're opening up new horizons in comedy here, folks.
(3) Use a stiff wire brush to gently scrub the surface of the grates.
(4) Drink a cold beer.
It got funnier the second time, didn't it?
(5) Sit in the lawn chair and try to think of easier ways to clean the grill. (Throwing the grill away after every use and buying a new one certainly isn’t practical, but that doesn’t mean the idea should not be considered.)
(6) Approach wife with the self-cleaning oven idea, which makes a whole lot of sense before and after several beers.
How much longer is this list going to be?
(7) Pick the ridicule and chastisement out of your backside for even thinking you were bringing those nasty grill grates into a perfectly clean kitchen and sticking them into a brand new and perfectly clean oven.
The more clauses you add, the more amusing a sentence becomes.
(8) Drink another beer, scoff at the fact that Scrubbing Bubbles is not recommended for cleaning grills.
(9) Ponder the various uses of a wire brush that don’t involve grill grates. (I couldn’t think of any others.)
Third beer reference in a single list. #9 is actually a decent question.
(10) Take a nap in the lawn chair, allowing the grill sufficient time to air dry.
By suggesting years ago that the self-cleaning oven could do the work of the warm, soapy water, Scrubbing Bubbles and wire brush, I had apparently violated some kind of No Stinky Grill Grates in My New Oven Rule.
"Stinky"? Are grill grates really stinky? Dirty, yes, but are they really known for their odor?
However, there are any number of websites these days where information can be found supporting the theory of putting the grill grates in the self-cleaning oven. Maybe I was just ahead of my time in this area of thinking 10 years ago.
Try reading both those sentences out loud. They sound TERRIBLE. At this point, it may be interesting to refer back to his June 10, 2010 article on virtually the same subject. Some quotes of interest:
"...the first round of meat was successfully charred over the holiday weekend."
"Personally, if mankind can invent a self-cleaning oven, then I think it should be able to invent a self-cleaning grill. Failing that, we should at least be able to remove the grill’s grates and place them in a self-cleaning oven..."
So we have this year's article in 100 words or less, basically. Burn food? Check. Clean grill? Check. The end.
Things have evolved now for me in the area of grilling. I no longer have the Weber kettle charcoal grill. I have some kind of Cadillac gas grill. It’s a big, old thing that takes up a good chunk of a relatively small back deck, and provides me the opportunity to efficiently burn the meat at a higher level of grilling incompetence.
It's old? He just purchased it a year ago. Unless he's trying to use "big old" as in "large," in which case that comma doesn't belong there. Glad we FINALLY established that he burns meat, too.
And I do not utilize the self-cleaning oven at our house to clean the grill, mostly because I’m not even sure we have a self-cleaning oven. It was not among the important questions I asked in advance of a second marriage, which is a shortcoming on my part. That question should have been higher on the list.
What is he even talking about now?
Admittedly though, switching from a charcoal grill to a gas grill has not come without its perplexing issues. For example, this weekend while I was I was goosing the chicken with barbecuing implements,
"I was I was" - somebody didn't proofread!
my father-in-law and I were chit-chatting, and he ended up schooling me in how to check the level of propane that’s left in the tank, a method that I had not yet learned.
From "for" to "learned," that's all one sentence. How on earth does this man presume to edit the writing of others?
But he is a camping enthusiast from way back, so he has a certain amount of credibility in this area. He said the way to determine the level of propane left in the tank was to take some boiling water and pour it on the tank. The areas of the tank on which the water didn’t boil determined the level of propane in the tank.
And here I thought the areas of the tank on which the water didn't boil determined the level of propane in the garage. Good thing he specified.
He told me this assuming that I knew how to boil water. However, my science skills are very limited in the principles of propane gas, and for a moment, I thought he was pulling my leg.
So now he doesn't know how to boil water. My "can't brush teeth" column idea probably isn't too far off.
It has always been my policy to try and stay out of hot water, and I judge a successful outdoor grilling experience as one that doesn’t involve me blowing up the house.
How would you blow up the house if you're grilling outdoors?
Somehow, boiling water on a propane gas tank just wasn’t registering with me. (Disclaimer: Not that I don’t believe my father-in-law, but I did not in fact try pouring boiling water on the tank, so don’t do it unless you know it to be safe.)
Science teachers are welcome to come by the office and boot me in the backside and demand an explanation for me not paying attention back in junior high science class.
What? A science teacher is going to attack him because he won't pour boiling water on his propane tank? I don't remember outdoor grilling being a part of my high school education.
But that’s the type of grilling I really don’t need.
This column in 100 words or less: "I'm bad at grilling, but I think you should clean the grill grates in a self-cleaning oven. I'm not sure we even have a self-cleaning oven. My father-in-law told me how you can tell if you have propane in the tank, but I don't want to try. Hopefully my high school science teacher won't find out. Bad pun."
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Compare and Contrast
Dan May’s a ‘Dying Breed’ but very much alive and well: Latest CD recorded in Spring House.
John Conahan to open show at Plays & Players.
Published: Tuesday, May 10, 2011
By Mike Morsch
Executive Editor
We've already had a column about Dan May, but I guess you can never get too much of a good thing. As this isn't a true "Outta Leftfield," I'm going to skip around to the best material.
Dan May’s new CD “Dying Breed” features the song “Paradise,” which turns out to be something a little different from what the title suggests.
He says one thing but means another? GENIUS!
The lyrics of the song feature things like America’s addiction to corn syrup, the manipulation practiced by pharmaceutical companies, global warming, plastic surgery, the use of the attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder-treating drug Ritalin and swipes at Fox News, Facebook, the banking industry and bailout and even the Catholic Church.
Aw, man! If he had just thrown in a stab at Sara Palin he'd have just about every liberal cliche in the book! Please note: Borsch will have nothing but praise for May (despite his heavily political material). Contrast this with his reaction to Dennis Miller's more right-wing approach.
Some description of paradise, huh?
“There’s a real connecting thread from song to song,” said May, the Philadelphia singer-songwriter, about his fourth full CD, recorded at MorningStar Studios in Spring House. “It’s a look back at the good old days that maybe weren’t as good as we thought they were.
How original.
An Americana-folk-tinged troubadour whose soft voice and thought-provoking lyrics have graced the region for the past several years, May said he continues to evolve and grow as a singer and songwriter and that “Dying Breed” is evidence of that.
Better be careful there, sir - all that drooling you're doing might short out your keyboard! So no remarks about how you didn't like May's newer music because it's so political? No asides about his height?
The original plan included premiering the video at the CD release party, but it isn’t completed yet. Those attending the soiree, however, will get an idea of what the finished product will look like as a “making of the video” short movie will be playing on a loop on a flat-screen television throughout the evening and after-party.
So the after-party doesn't take place during "the evening"?
May said he chose Plays and Players Theatre as the venue for the CD release party because he prefers theater shows as opposed to clubs and coffeehouses.
“The audience comes in with higher expectations and the experience is better in general,” said May, who had his last CD release party at the Academy of Vocal Arts in Philadelphia, where he had graduated from opera training. “It’s a beautiful old theater [Plays and Players] and it’s in a very cool section of the city, right off Rittenhouse Square.”
I included this section to emphasize what a clumsy writer Borsch is. The [Plays and Players] is only necessary because of how awkward and convoluted the structure of his sentence is. What I find strange is that Borsch probably added those brackets to try and clarify his point - instead of re-writing it to eliminate the confusion altogether.
May, who has used studio musicians on some of his past CDs but used his regular band members on “Dying Breed,” anticipates that his already established fan base will like this album.
What does the fact that he's not using studio musicians have to do with the rest of that paragraph? Really, can you slip these little asides in anywhere you please? "May, who drips hot candle wax on his genitals to achieve satisfaction, thinks the release party will be a hit."
“I call this one organic and Americana, which are words I throw out there when I don’t know what I’m talking about,” he quipped. “Americana to me, it’s not country and it’s not folk but it has those influences. It’s that kind of American sound with a touch of folk.
... But I thought it wasn't folk. Didn't he just say that in the previous sentence? It's not folk, but it has a touch of folk.
Fort Washington resident John Conahan, who teaches music at Wissahickon High School, will open for May at the CD release party. Known for his audience interaction, Conahan’s award-winning songs have been featured on television, in film and promotional campaigns as well on syndicated radio programs. He is a regular at the Tin Angel, the World Café Live, the Living Room, the National Underground, Rockwood Music Hall and the Kimmel Center for the Performing Arts in Philadelphia.
BOOM. The end.
John Conahan to open show at Plays & Players.
Published: Tuesday, May 10, 2011
By Mike Morsch
Executive Editor
We've already had a column about Dan May, but I guess you can never get too much of a good thing. As this isn't a true "Outta Leftfield," I'm going to skip around to the best material.
Dan May’s new CD “Dying Breed” features the song “Paradise,” which turns out to be something a little different from what the title suggests.
He says one thing but means another? GENIUS!
The lyrics of the song feature things like America’s addiction to corn syrup, the manipulation practiced by pharmaceutical companies, global warming, plastic surgery, the use of the attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder-treating drug Ritalin and swipes at Fox News, Facebook, the banking industry and bailout and even the Catholic Church.
Aw, man! If he had just thrown in a stab at Sara Palin he'd have just about every liberal cliche in the book! Please note: Borsch will have nothing but praise for May (despite his heavily political material). Contrast this with his reaction to Dennis Miller's more right-wing approach.
Some description of paradise, huh?
“There’s a real connecting thread from song to song,” said May, the Philadelphia singer-songwriter, about his fourth full CD, recorded at MorningStar Studios in Spring House. “It’s a look back at the good old days that maybe weren’t as good as we thought they were.
How original.
An Americana-folk-tinged troubadour whose soft voice and thought-provoking lyrics have graced the region for the past several years, May said he continues to evolve and grow as a singer and songwriter and that “Dying Breed” is evidence of that.
Better be careful there, sir - all that drooling you're doing might short out your keyboard! So no remarks about how you didn't like May's newer music because it's so political? No asides about his height?
The original plan included premiering the video at the CD release party, but it isn’t completed yet. Those attending the soiree, however, will get an idea of what the finished product will look like as a “making of the video” short movie will be playing on a loop on a flat-screen television throughout the evening and after-party.
So the after-party doesn't take place during "the evening"?
May said he chose Plays and Players Theatre as the venue for the CD release party because he prefers theater shows as opposed to clubs and coffeehouses.
“The audience comes in with higher expectations and the experience is better in general,” said May, who had his last CD release party at the Academy of Vocal Arts in Philadelphia, where he had graduated from opera training. “It’s a beautiful old theater [Plays and Players] and it’s in a very cool section of the city, right off Rittenhouse Square.”
I included this section to emphasize what a clumsy writer Borsch is. The [Plays and Players] is only necessary because of how awkward and convoluted the structure of his sentence is. What I find strange is that Borsch probably added those brackets to try and clarify his point - instead of re-writing it to eliminate the confusion altogether.
May, who has used studio musicians on some of his past CDs but used his regular band members on “Dying Breed,” anticipates that his already established fan base will like this album.
What does the fact that he's not using studio musicians have to do with the rest of that paragraph? Really, can you slip these little asides in anywhere you please? "May, who drips hot candle wax on his genitals to achieve satisfaction, thinks the release party will be a hit."
“I call this one organic and Americana, which are words I throw out there when I don’t know what I’m talking about,” he quipped. “Americana to me, it’s not country and it’s not folk but it has those influences. It’s that kind of American sound with a touch of folk.
... But I thought it wasn't folk. Didn't he just say that in the previous sentence? It's not folk, but it has a touch of folk.
Fort Washington resident John Conahan, who teaches music at Wissahickon High School, will open for May at the CD release party. Known for his audience interaction, Conahan’s award-winning songs have been featured on television, in film and promotional campaigns as well on syndicated radio programs. He is a regular at the Tin Angel, the World Café Live, the Living Room, the National Underground, Rockwood Music Hall and the Kimmel Center for the Performing Arts in Philadelphia.
BOOM. The end.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
If you can't say anything nice...
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Miller time at The Keswick
"Miller time." How original.
Dennis Miller wasn’t as tall as I thought he would be. But he’s got a great smile and laugh, and he seemed genuinely flattered that people wanted to meet him and get a picture taken with him last week prior to his show at the Keswick Theater.
So by this logic... a short person is less likely to smile, laugh and be flattered? If Miller had been taller, the fact that he was cheerful and friendly wouldn't have been a surprise?
I was fortunate to be among a group of about 20 people who got the opportunity to shake Miller’s hand that evening. He introduced himself to each person individually with a “Hi, I’m Dennis,” almost like we didn’t know who he was.
Wow, shaking hands! The true hallmark of a gracious celebrity. And we already know he took the unheard-of step of posing for photographs.
There was some brief backstage banter before Miller suggested we all go out on stage and take the pictures, with the Keswick seats steadily filling about 15 minutes before show time serving as the backdrop.
That was a poorly-written sentence. Keep in mind, this man makes a living on his presumed skill with the English language.
Unfortunately, the pre-show stage lighting — a kind of a dark blue — played havoc with my photos and they all came out with a dark blue tint, making the images almost indistinguishable, even when using a flash. I wonder if any of the other folks with cameras had the same problem.
Well, that last paragraph might have been completely uninteresting and unnecessary, but at least it was jam-packed with madcap humor!
As for the show, I didn’t laugh as much as I would have liked, but not because Miller wasn’t funny. Between watching his last HBO special and the phone call interview I had with him to preview the appearance, much of it was repeat information.
Yeah, isn't it boring having to see the same material over and over again? The same jokes and puns? Imagine how your readers must feel, sir.
In fact, at the end of the interview, I had asked him what the Keswick crowd could expect at a Dennis Miller show. “This phone call for about an hour,” he said.
And that’s what it turned out to be. One can’t quibble that Dennis Miller didn’t deliver the kind of show that he had promised to deliver.
A good writer - or editor - would have replaced that clumsy second "deliver" with "he would" or something of that nature.
He is very hesitant to say good things about Miller. When he does, he adds a caveat. Miller was friendly - but short. He was funny - but not up to Borsch's high expectations. Borsch isn't coming right out and saying so, but Miller's conservative politics are the root cause.
One other observation: Political humor is a tough gig right now, given the polarization in our country.
I knew it! He couldn't resist.
I grew up with the humor of George Carlin, who I thought was both funny and brilliant. But in the latter part of his career, Carlin became more political and more anti-government, anti-religion and just about anti-everything. And it just wasn’t as funny as his other stuff.
Miller's humor has always had political elements - "Weekend Update," anyone? The only difference is a shift from left to right.
Miller strikes me as being on a similar path. His stories about taking his mother to meet Frank Sinatra, the shenanigans during his stint as a Monday Nigh Football commentator and the craziness that was the early days of Saturday Night Live were all enjoyable and funny bits. The political stuff, not so much.
Because you don't agree with it. It's okay - I find it hard to laugh at Carlin and his ilk. But just admit it. The disappointment Borsch felt over Miller's swing to the right is palpable in each column he's written, but he keeps trying to weasel out of it.
Maybe the comedians haven’t changed over the years. Maybe it’s the politics that just isn’t funny anymore.
So Carlin never made any Nixon jokes? Never did any bits on Reagan? Morsch doesn't crack wise about Trump and revel in the wit of Keith Olbermann? Please.
To summarize this story by paragraph:
Meeting Dennis (he was short) - 2 paragraphs
Taking pictures (poor lighting) - 2 paragraphs
Show wasn't very funny - 2 paragraphs
Political humor wasn't funny - 4 paragraphs
So what, in his mind, was the true thrust of this post? By the way, none of the paragraphs contained a joke.
Labels: Dennis Miller, Keswick Theater, Mike Morsch, Montgomery Newspapers, Outta Leftfield
Miller time at The Keswick
"Miller time." How original.
Dennis Miller wasn’t as tall as I thought he would be. But he’s got a great smile and laugh, and he seemed genuinely flattered that people wanted to meet him and get a picture taken with him last week prior to his show at the Keswick Theater.
So by this logic... a short person is less likely to smile, laugh and be flattered? If Miller had been taller, the fact that he was cheerful and friendly wouldn't have been a surprise?
I was fortunate to be among a group of about 20 people who got the opportunity to shake Miller’s hand that evening. He introduced himself to each person individually with a “Hi, I’m Dennis,” almost like we didn’t know who he was.
Wow, shaking hands! The true hallmark of a gracious celebrity. And we already know he took the unheard-of step of posing for photographs.
There was some brief backstage banter before Miller suggested we all go out on stage and take the pictures, with the Keswick seats steadily filling about 15 minutes before show time serving as the backdrop.
That was a poorly-written sentence. Keep in mind, this man makes a living on his presumed skill with the English language.
Unfortunately, the pre-show stage lighting — a kind of a dark blue — played havoc with my photos and they all came out with a dark blue tint, making the images almost indistinguishable, even when using a flash. I wonder if any of the other folks with cameras had the same problem.
Well, that last paragraph might have been completely uninteresting and unnecessary, but at least it was jam-packed with madcap humor!
As for the show, I didn’t laugh as much as I would have liked, but not because Miller wasn’t funny. Between watching his last HBO special and the phone call interview I had with him to preview the appearance, much of it was repeat information.
Yeah, isn't it boring having to see the same material over and over again? The same jokes and puns? Imagine how your readers must feel, sir.
In fact, at the end of the interview, I had asked him what the Keswick crowd could expect at a Dennis Miller show. “This phone call for about an hour,” he said.
And that’s what it turned out to be. One can’t quibble that Dennis Miller didn’t deliver the kind of show that he had promised to deliver.
A good writer - or editor - would have replaced that clumsy second "deliver" with "he would" or something of that nature.
He is very hesitant to say good things about Miller. When he does, he adds a caveat. Miller was friendly - but short. He was funny - but not up to Borsch's high expectations. Borsch isn't coming right out and saying so, but Miller's conservative politics are the root cause.
One other observation: Political humor is a tough gig right now, given the polarization in our country.
I knew it! He couldn't resist.
I grew up with the humor of George Carlin, who I thought was both funny and brilliant. But in the latter part of his career, Carlin became more political and more anti-government, anti-religion and just about anti-everything. And it just wasn’t as funny as his other stuff.
Miller's humor has always had political elements - "Weekend Update," anyone? The only difference is a shift from left to right.
Miller strikes me as being on a similar path. His stories about taking his mother to meet Frank Sinatra, the shenanigans during his stint as a Monday Nigh Football commentator and the craziness that was the early days of Saturday Night Live were all enjoyable and funny bits. The political stuff, not so much.
Because you don't agree with it. It's okay - I find it hard to laugh at Carlin and his ilk. But just admit it. The disappointment Borsch felt over Miller's swing to the right is palpable in each column he's written, but he keeps trying to weasel out of it.
Maybe the comedians haven’t changed over the years. Maybe it’s the politics that just isn’t funny anymore.
So Carlin never made any Nixon jokes? Never did any bits on Reagan? Morsch doesn't crack wise about Trump and revel in the wit of Keith Olbermann? Please.
To summarize this story by paragraph:
Meeting Dennis (he was short) - 2 paragraphs
Taking pictures (poor lighting) - 2 paragraphs
Show wasn't very funny - 2 paragraphs
Political humor wasn't funny - 4 paragraphs
So what, in his mind, was the true thrust of this post? By the way, none of the paragraphs contained a joke.
Labels: Dennis Miller, Keswick Theater, Mike Morsch, Montgomery Newspapers, Outta Leftfield
Taking a Pass
Via Twitter:
Tough week last week. We lost our beloved family pet. Here is the column on that.
Ouch. I really can't touch this one; like Tony Soprano, I have a soft spot for pets. So like the Red Baron dropping a bottle of champaign down to Snoopy on Christmas, I'll just tip my cap to Mr. Morsch this week. We will meet again another day.
Tough week last week. We lost our beloved family pet. Here is the column on that.
Ouch. I really can't touch this one; like Tony Soprano, I have a soft spot for pets. So like the Red Baron dropping a bottle of champaign down to Snoopy on Christmas, I'll just tip my cap to Mr. Morsch this week. We will meet again another day.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Yet Another Stooges Convention!
Three Stooges co-stars highlight annual convention in Fort Washington
Published: Monday, May 02, 2011
By Mike Morsch
Executive Editor
I look forward to seeing what chunks of his previous Three Stooges stories he will vomit back up for us to enjoy. Column highlights:
The 2011 Three Stooges Fan Club Meeting featured two of those co-stars — Adrian Booth Brian and Sally Starr — who greeted fans and signed autographs as part of the annual knuckleheadfest Saturday and Sunday, which also included events at the Stoogeum, a Smithsonian-quality museum in nearby Spring House, owned and operated by Gary Lassin.
2009 Article - "Gary also is owner and curator of the Stoogeum, a museum of his personal collection of Stooges memorabilia in Springhouse..."
2010 Article - "Gary Lassin... curator of the fabulous Stoogeum museum in Spring House..."
Wow, the Stoogeum has gone from "a museum" to a "fabulous... museum" to "a Smithsonian-quality museum"! How does Mr. Lassin afford all those upgrades?
Philadelphia fans will remember “Our gal Sal” Sally Starr...
... No.
The Stooges actually appeared on her show during its run. Because of that exposure to a new generation, Starr was among those credited with helping revive the careers of The Three Stooges — which had waned in the late 1950s — to the point that the boys offered her a part in their 1965 feature-length film, “The Outlaws is Coming,” which also starred Adam West, who would go on in 1966 to play the lead role in the campy television series “Batman.”
That's right, folks - from "because" to "Batman," that's all one sentence. Try reading it all in one breath.
Starr said she first met the Stooges in the early to mid-1960s when they performed at the Latin Casino, a Philadelphia-area nightclub just across the river in Cherry Hill, N.J. Among the big names to appear at “The Latin” in those days were Frank Sinatra, Don Rickles, Tom Jones, The Supremes, Frankie Avalon and Bobby Darin, among others.
Why do we have to get this unnecessary extra info? Adam West was also in a movie, Tom Jones performed at the same club... Maybe in more skilled hands these tidbits would add flavor to a story, but here they're obviously just space-consuming filler.
At age 93, Adrian Booth Brian is one of the oldest-living Stooges co-stars... Booth Brian said that with the release of “You Natzy Spy!” in 1940, she and the Stooges became the first to satirize Adolph Hitler, “ahead of Charlie Chaplin and everybody else.”
“The Great Dictator,” starring Chaplin, was released in October 1940 and is considered Chaplin’s first true talking picture and was his most commercially successfully film.
Again, why is this information here??? Come on, Borsch, these are the Three Stooges! Talk about pie fights and "nyuks" and knuckleheads!
As for the Stooges, Booth Brian said she enjoyed every minute working with them.
“Moe was kind of the brains. Larry was just very sweet,” she said. “They weren’t very much different off camera than they were on camera. But they were very nice to me.”
... The end. Frankly, I was anticipating more. There is a video attached to this story, by the way. It's 1:30 long, and features plenty of classic Borsch slow-pans and awkward close-ups. It concludes with him filming somebody's license plate because it reads "STOOGES," like a vanity license plate is an Earth-shattering discovery.
Published: Monday, May 02, 2011
By Mike Morsch
Executive Editor
I look forward to seeing what chunks of his previous Three Stooges stories he will vomit back up for us to enjoy. Column highlights:
The 2011 Three Stooges Fan Club Meeting featured two of those co-stars — Adrian Booth Brian and Sally Starr — who greeted fans and signed autographs as part of the annual knuckleheadfest Saturday and Sunday, which also included events at the Stoogeum, a Smithsonian-quality museum in nearby Spring House, owned and operated by Gary Lassin.
2009 Article - "Gary also is owner and curator of the Stoogeum, a museum of his personal collection of Stooges memorabilia in Springhouse..."
2010 Article - "Gary Lassin... curator of the fabulous Stoogeum museum in Spring House..."
Wow, the Stoogeum has gone from "a museum" to a "fabulous... museum" to "a Smithsonian-quality museum"! How does Mr. Lassin afford all those upgrades?
Philadelphia fans will remember “Our gal Sal” Sally Starr...
... No.
The Stooges actually appeared on her show during its run. Because of that exposure to a new generation, Starr was among those credited with helping revive the careers of The Three Stooges — which had waned in the late 1950s — to the point that the boys offered her a part in their 1965 feature-length film, “The Outlaws is Coming,” which also starred Adam West, who would go on in 1966 to play the lead role in the campy television series “Batman.”
That's right, folks - from "because" to "Batman," that's all one sentence. Try reading it all in one breath.
Starr said she first met the Stooges in the early to mid-1960s when they performed at the Latin Casino, a Philadelphia-area nightclub just across the river in Cherry Hill, N.J. Among the big names to appear at “The Latin” in those days were Frank Sinatra, Don Rickles, Tom Jones, The Supremes, Frankie Avalon and Bobby Darin, among others.
Why do we have to get this unnecessary extra info? Adam West was also in a movie, Tom Jones performed at the same club... Maybe in more skilled hands these tidbits would add flavor to a story, but here they're obviously just space-consuming filler.
At age 93, Adrian Booth Brian is one of the oldest-living Stooges co-stars... Booth Brian said that with the release of “You Natzy Spy!” in 1940, she and the Stooges became the first to satirize Adolph Hitler, “ahead of Charlie Chaplin and everybody else.”
“The Great Dictator,” starring Chaplin, was released in October 1940 and is considered Chaplin’s first true talking picture and was his most commercially successfully film.
Again, why is this information here??? Come on, Borsch, these are the Three Stooges! Talk about pie fights and "nyuks" and knuckleheads!
As for the Stooges, Booth Brian said she enjoyed every minute working with them.
“Moe was kind of the brains. Larry was just very sweet,” she said. “They weren’t very much different off camera than they were on camera. But they were very nice to me.”
... The end. Frankly, I was anticipating more. There is a video attached to this story, by the way. It's 1:30 long, and features plenty of classic Borsch slow-pans and awkward close-ups. It concludes with him filming somebody's license plate because it reads "STOOGES," like a vanity license plate is an Earth-shattering discovery.
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